The Loss Of Innocence

The man in the photograph looks down upon a little boy, an obvious tenderness passing through the touch of their outstretched hands. It's a picture of innocence and admiration--a boy and his hero.

Boys need larger-than-life heroes to fuel their aspirations and give substance to their dreams. And they must be heroes who are somehow able to right the wrongs of a world that's not always friendly to little boys.

Aside from fathers and older brothers, little boys seem to have an affinity for a certain stripe of hero. Flawless, real heroes are men of intense, fierce action. Heroes' hands hold a world of excitement, and little boys aspire to the same. They long to fight raging fires, split the night with shrieking train whistles, nab fleeing crooks, level forests with bulldozers, ride with the wind on the open range.

The boy's face is barely visible in the picture. But even the blackness of the silhouette doesn't completely hide the beams of awe and respect reserved for only the truest, bluest heroes. But there's something else. The scene confirms the saying that imitation is the highest mark of admiration, and on the boy's head is the proof. He's wearing his own fire hat for this intimate moment with his hero--a fireman.

This was not his only trip to the fire station. It's reported that his mother could hardly pass there without a detour. Even when they couldn't stop, they would at least look. The engines, hoses, and axes were all sources of wonder in those days. And boys want to breathe the very air their heroes breathe.

But somewhere along the way the fascination fizzled out. Nobody knows how it happened. A day just came when he didn't want to stop anymore. Not believing her ears, his mother investigated. After all, their frequent sashays to the fire station were legendary. His answer was simple enough. "I've discovered that I don't really like fires." And so it was that innocence was lost, driven away by stark reality.

Ben Jonson said of innocence, "They that know no evil will suspect none." Likewise, the boy had seen glamour apart from danger. Once he realized that fires are hot, angry demons, his aspirations went up in smoke. And he forsook his hero.

Isn't it easy to fall prey to such thinking? Difficulties set in, bringing disillusionment with jobs, mates, children, or friends. And like the boy, we quickly conclude, "I've had enough."

You wouldn't know it from the picture, but the fireman-hero once almost lost his life in fulfilling his calling. But children can't comprehend honor, duty and faithfulness that mock trouble. They simply see fun and march ahead.

And when the fun's over, it's time for something new. It's surprising how many long-standing relationships rest on such shifting sand. But the would-be fireman had an excuse for his abrupt change of heart. He was just shy of three years old, a time when choosing one's destiny on the basis of fun is OK.

Copyright 1999 James McAlister

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