Make Breaking Up Harder To Do
Thankfully, this wasn't a human relationship, but it was one I had relied on many times. But there were limits--gaps in philosophy that reason could not bridge. And in the breakup I see similarities about how human bonds can quickly be hewn asunder.
The other party in this conflict is "Titan Telecom," a behemoth company that had smoothly supplied my long-distance telephone needs for eons. But a thunderbolt of trouble struck when I signed up for a new service--and cancelled it later the same day.
No problem, Agent 1 promised, giving me a confirmation number as proof of her sincerity. Ten days I stumbled upon the truth: the cancellation never happened.
I called to inquire. Agent 2, mystified, suggested I call back once the bill arrived. They would "fix it" then, she promised, and bolstered my confidence with another confirmation number. But the $170 bill for 10 days of long distance escalated the misunderstanding.
Agents 3 through a zillion, it seems, issued credits, each duly jerked away by the Untouchables--a mysterious group in Titan Telecom to whom both Agents and I were forbidden to talk. Many precious hours later Agent Supervisor explained: Agents can't cancel service, and confirmation numbers mean nothing. Because Agent 1 was supposed to have informed me, I would have to pay. Rules are rules for one dollar or $170.
Even when sorely pressed, he used well-rehearsed weasel words to avoid admitting the error of Agent 1--or accepting any responsibility for it. Nevertheless, he graciously agreed to process a credit, but only as an "accommodation" to me. The Untouchables promptly snatched it away.
Thus went the singsong, back-and-forth, give-and-take dialog for three months. A complaint filed with the Public Service Commission eventually produced real results, but never any admission of either error or responsibility. But at least the final credit, also offered as an "accommodation," slipped past the Untouchables and into my account.
My account is now closed, and the relationship with Titan has been permanently slam-dunked. And in analyzing this trivial but pitiful scenario, I offer these time-tested rules for breaking up any relationship--human or otherwise:
1. Never admit that you are wrong, even when you know you are. And if cornered like a rat, don't apologize, at least with words that might be construed as an admission of error.
2. Never agree that the other party even has a point that you understand.
3. Let others know that a few dollars in the pocket are worth more than a relationship.
4. Act like a bully when you think you can get away with it.
5. Make promises you know you can't keep--and then blame someone else.
I'm sure there are others, but these are enough to remind me that there is no substitute for honesty, forthrightness and mutual understanding when working out problems. They make breaking up a lot harder to do.
Copyright 2002 James McAlister
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